When I was pregnant with my daughter, I felt a deep connection to myself. I dreamt about her and that her soul communicated with me when she was still growing inside of me. She told me that she chose our family, that she had been waiting for us and she even chose her name.
I thrived throughout my plant-based pregnancy and experienced nine months of craving-free, energetic bliss. I felt like a glowing goddess. I loved my belly, I loved feeling her inside of me and I felt like such a woman. I visualized the pregnancy and birth experience that I wanted and everything went exactly as I had hoped it would.
It wasn’t that I didn’t know how to take care of Ivy. I did. Women are magical, powerful, maternal creatures and we innately know how to care for our children.
But becoming a mother is CRAZY. It’s the biggest life change I’ve ever gone through and those first few weeks can leave you feeling so estranged from the person you thought you were. Sleep deprivation. Hormones. Healing.
As a result, I didn’t trust my instincts. I googled everything. I didn’t do this throughout my pregnancy. In additional to the few sources that I trusted, along with my midwife, I KNEW in my heart to trust my body and to trust my growing baby! But after she was born, I lost that connection. I forgot how to trust myself. I forgot how to trust her. I read blogs. I read books. I talked to other moms. I stressed about EVERYTHING. How much is she sleeping? Does she need a routine? Do I allow her to comfort nurse? Am I creating bad habits by holding her too much?
Thankfully, it didn’t take me long (five weeks) to find my way back to my intuition.
I stopped googling. I stopped reading. I had ONE trusted source (kellymom.com) and a plan to shut out the noise. I told myself to imagine that I was in deep in the forest with my baby. I didn’t have wifi. I didn’t have google. I didn’t have a library of baby books to read. All I had was my inner voice, my inner knowing, my intuition and my baby. It was my job to tune into myself and to tune into her. To watch her and learn what she needed and then respond in the way I felt was best. If I needed an outside opinion, I could ask one of the few women in my personal life who I trusted. And that was it. That’s all I allowed myself to have.
Once I established those ground rules, things got so much better. Even though my postpartum anxiety was still getting worse, I had my CONFIDENCE back. I knew how to take care of my baby and I trusted my intuition again.
Mothers, we all have this power inside of us. Deep in our history, in everything that we are, we have our intuition that can guide us. Your baby feeds off of your energy and the more you trust your intuition and ability to parent, the more relaxed your baby will be.
If you’re feeling lost like I was, here are 3 things to try:
1. Set Boundaries
I knew that I had to stop looking outside for answers and start tuning in to my tiny teacher and myself. So I set boundaries and didn’t allow myself to google anymore. I deleted baby apps off of my phone. I actively paid closer attention to my daughter and acted on my first instincts.
Take a moment to breathe. Try a free, 10-minute guided meditation on YouTube. If you have a newborn baby, lay them across your lap and meditate with your baby. Or you can try holding your baby to your chest, to feel the closeness and your energies connect. Quiet your mind, take deep breaths and focus on the love and knowledge that’s within your heart.
3. Find a Circle
Women have been sharing in a circle for centuries. Find a women’s group or a mother’s group where you feel safe, accepted and comfortable and lean on mothers you can trust.
Related Reads: I Should Be Grateful: An Essay on Motherhood, Can Men Have Intuition?, 4 Ways to Get Grounded and Connect to Your Inner Spirit This Summer, and What the Moon Can Teach Us About Our Menstrual Cycles.
ASHLEY WOOD is a spiritual and intuitive guide, lightworker, Akashic Records reader and mother dedicated to empowering women to live their best life. She is the host of Manifest This!, an internationally recognized and respected podcast and also a long-time contributor to The Body Book. She is passionate about vegan living, yoga, animals and the outdoors. She resides in Winnipeg, Canada with her husband Ben, daughter Ivy and cats Bose and Feesh. Together they create and produce Manifest This! and own Lot 49 Dairy-Free Foods.